Wassup my dank homies and homettes.

Chilling out maxing, shooting some b-ball outside of school, you know the usual. Not really been doing much but doing fetch quests on elite dangerous and almost breaking shit and quitting bloodborne haha. I literally hate that game but it hated me first so I feel justified. I’ve never played a game with game design that had more clear disdain for it’s player base, like every level is designed to piss you off and just be a big fuck you to the player.

This coming from someone who has played and completed all the souls games the first two without even needing any co-op, and it was savage as fuck. But I dunno, just playing bloodborne it felt different, it wasn’t as fun, I actually stopped playing DS3 because it was kind of boring despite the fact I made the most OP sunbro miracle knight ever. I could annihilate people in pvp, I could just shoot fucking lighting from my hands like a sith lord, a giant great sword can’t compete with that. But I dunno, the tone and the gameplay of bloodborne just seems much more hateful and less fun and I was sick of grinding through those boring ass chalice dungeons. They’re stupidly hard and boring to look at, I just couldn’t see the point of them. It’s basically just the same dungeon over and over again and the same recycled bosses, just seems like artificial padding in a game that already seems pretty big and padded with difficulty.

Also the ‘Lovecraftian’ themes are stretched unbelievably thin, I mean to a point where you can’t even tell me what’s defined as Lovecraftian anymore, I mean is a giant eye monster lovecraftian, does it have tentacles? It’s much more gothic really and Lovecraft was essentially trying to divert from gothic horror. I would love it if there over Lovercraft themes but I can’t see them, Lovecraftian has just become a label to help sell horror shit to people that haven’t read any Lovecraft.

Speaking of Lovecraft, been cracking on with my own little Lovecraft story and I had some difficulty with it at first, it wasn’t really flowing well and I struggled to meet even a 1k word quota but recently it’s been getting easier because I’ve been breaking down the style a lot more.

It starts thick with the Lovecraft style and then flows into a more noir action story telling thriller style which was what I was going for. I didn’t really want to a Lovecraftian horror story as much as I wanted to do almost like a noir-thriller, superhero story like the Crow. So like a Lovecraftian supernatural revenge thriller, and it’s made the transition quite well, it’s pretty fun to write and it actually really portrays how far I’ve come as a writer because the action shows a lot of restraint a younger me would not have shown.

You can really tell when someone is having too much fun with action and just let’s it run away with its self and it gets self indulgent and slocky and drags down the story. Subtlety and simplicity is the best way, keep it clean and concise and to the point.

Well regardless, it’s fun, I’m kind of just writing it to keep busy and sharp until some bigger inspiration hits me. Waiting for lighting to strike or atleast until I can scrape together enough cash to have DDD edited so I can start sending it to lit agents, which is gonna take even longer now that my editor quit editing, which was nothing to do with me. I guess she just prefers writing eulogies, but she let me off the final bill for TOTCB saving me like seventy quid that I don’t have but I can’t say when she’ll be done with it. So just have to wait and see.

See you…

–

“She’s not infected!” TJ cried

“Ok she’s not infected” Jimmy said, Carpenter forced a laugh and Jimmy said “We can’t deal with this shit now, we need a plan to get out of here.” He paced the room and added “I don’t, I don’t like enclosed spaces”. He swallowed.

TJ got a far away look and tossed spit around his mouth. His eyes and his mouth were a awash with excess fluid as he cradled the seemingly comatose Sunday, her eyes half open.

“My dad” Jimmy’s voice got wobbly and he stopped. “He thought we could hole up in some little bookstore the last time, thought we’d be safe. You know wait for the army or the national guard or the cops, someone, anyone.” He paced up and down and looking at nothing. “But no one came and then all that shit started falling out of the sky and some fucking freak swallowed him whole, like nothing.”

“Hahahahahahaha” Carpenter laughed and said “Daddy issues”

“FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, YOU OLD CRAZY FUCK” Jimmy schreeched almost foaming at the mouth.

“Jeezus and I thought I had problems” BJ said.

“I’m ok” A little far away voice said. “TJ, I’m ok” Sunday opened her eyes, they were bloodshot, she was paler than usual, but she looked up at him and propped up a weak smile. She rolled out of his lap into a sitting position putting her hand on her head as she felt the liquid in her brain shifting hitting her like a hangover. “Oww, how long was I out?”

“Hour maybe” Jimmy said pouting, arms folded seething with rage.

“Where are we?” She said looking around.

“The pokey” A hoarse voice said.

“So you found him? Figures he’d be in a place like this” Sunday said looking through the bars at the king in rags himself lying on his bench on his back. “Has a problem with authority”. She said smiling.

Carpenter laughed and said “That’s rich.”

She turned to TJ who seemed to be breathing steady, like he was seeing her rise from the dead again. “So what now?”

“You’re asking me” He scoffed.

“Where’d they take our stuff?”

“Ergh evidence locker most like” BJ piped up again in the cell on the other side.

“Who’s this guy now?” Sunday said still holding her head.

“It’s a long story” TJ flustered.

“No it aint” BJ said.

“Let’s change the subject” TJ said.

“If you say so”. Sunday said.

Sunday rocked forward and took in a deep breath and said “So we get out of here, get our stuff and then move on until that guy calls us again?”

“But how do we get out, dp said Carpenter could help us escape”. TJ said.

“Escape?” Carpenter said almost to himself. “That’s your ‘escape’ right there.” He said laughing nodding at Bobby’s cold corpse, stiff in a puddle of his own blood and brain matter. He laughed, a cold pitiless laugh, the laugh of a pirate skeleton guarding a cursed treasure in a dark dank cave.

Sunday let out a breathy laugh like she got the joke.

“What?” TJ said.

“He’s fucking with us, if he’s here it’s because he wants to be. He’s got a way out he just wants to hear us say ‘pretty please with cherries on top’ isn’t that right old man?”

He said nothing, lying motionless on the bench.

“Look at this guy, does he look like he has any plan? Is Carpenter even his name? Does he remember what he had for breakfast?” Jimmy yelled.

“Mr badman, when are you gonna come and play with me?” The little girl’s voice whined. “If you don’t come out and play the monsters will get you.” She offered her threat but he remained silent. “There’s someone coming”.

–

The funny little Frenchman walked into the lobby of whitefish police department. He was doddering like an a lost old woman in the warmth of the lobby. He approached the counter with the bullet proof glass dropping his duffel bag on the floor smiling.

“Good evening mademoiselle” He said jovially like he was birthday party clown.

Maria didn’t even lift her head to look at the funny man.

He cleared his throat and continued on despite being ignored. “Err yes, I’m in search of a man I believe you may have him here.”

“Visiting hours are over, come back tomorrow.” Maria said out of the side of her mouth without looking up.

The frenchman looked up and through the bullet proof glass on the balls of his feet and came back on his heels and said “Ah qui.” He smiled and said “I’ll be back”.

He picked up his duffel bag and walked back out through the frosted glass front doors.

Maria turned the page of the romance novel she was reading and sighed like she couldn’t believe the night she was having.

Out of nowhere a burning toilet roll hit the bullet proof glass making a dull thudding sound. She jumped out of her skin as the toilet roll rolled on the tiled floor. Fear suddenly boiling into rage as she leapt up from her seat said “Fucking gringo kids!” under her breath. She hurriedly unlocked the office outer door and came out into the lobby. “Fucking little pinche’ sons of bitches!” she said as she stomped out the flames on the toilet roll, her half heels clicking on the tiles. She stomped missing, hitting the edges as the roll moved with her blows, dancing away from her foot taunting her. She got gradually more mad, the toilet roll was light but had an odd weigh to it and her anger didn’t help her aim. She squealed as she tried to stamp out the flames. She bit her lip and almost screamed as she lifted her foot above the roll and brought it down with a tight crunch. The force of the blow and the fire disintegrated the roll. A springing clicking noise came out of nowhere as the pressure from the cardboard roll was no longer there. Releasing the firing pin of the grenade inside and launched it into the corner of the room skitting across the tiled floor.

“Oh no” Maria said.

–