Search

Darkly Dreaming Demographic.

Where weird shit hits bizarre fans.

Category

tv

Starship troopers pilot end scene

Yeah well that’s that I guess.

Kinda running out of content but I changed tacts recently I decided if I just wasn’t feeling Kur 2 I wouldn’t continue until I was in the mood for it and just to write something else for fun until I was up to it.

I mean there’s no point in writing more Kur if I think it’s garbage or my hearts not in it so I’ve just been working on other stuff, which will be a really shit surprise for thursday haha.

So don’t hold your breath for that. Most of my time and energy is going towards finding a new job and getting out of this shitty country and being with my daughter. Writing is on the back burner until that in the works.

Probably gonna do a Captain Marvel review because I pirated it last night and I hated it but I’m not sure I have enough to say about it because it was such a nothing burger of a film. Even by marvel standards it was just bleh, completely formless and pointless with some of the most cringe dialogue ever written. I kind of had to force myself to believe it was made by people and not an algorithm.

Anyway gotta get to proofreading that new shitty stuff I was writing instead of Kur for thursday and of course flooding barbados with my cv haha.

See you…

ExT. in space above the planet. day

 

 

We return to Rico as he falls in and out of consciousness

faling

towards the planet in his damaged pod.

 

 

DiZZY

 

 

RICO!

 

 

JELLY

 

 

RICO! YOU’RE A SITTING DUCK KID!

 

 

 

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

YOU NEED TO BREAK AWAY FROM YOUR POD OR THEY’LL PICK UP YOUR HEAT

SIG

.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

RICO CAN YOU HEAR ME?

 

 

Rico is barely conscious as he’s falling getting faster. He wakes up and inhales and muscle memory starts to kick in and he engages the servos in his power armor.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

YOU HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL YOU PASS THE ATMOSPHERE OR YOU’LL BURN UP!

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

RICO CAN YOU HEAR ME?

 

 

The pod is entering the atmosphere and its rough, it’s hot and parts of the pod are coming off.

 

 

He clears the outer atmosphere and starts into free fall. He starts to kick his way out of his pod. The huge desert planet getting larger and coming faster at him as he falls.

 

 

 

 

 

Power armor voice

 

 

Proximity alert! Proximity alert!

 

 

Rico flips a release to break away the last layer of the egg pod.

 

 

The first charge pops all the straps and then the outer shell.

 

 

Now he’s actually falling, nothing separating him from the outside world, just his suit and falling with the air under his feet.

 

 

POWER ARMOR VOICE (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Brace for impact!

 

 

He looks around the terrain and sees enemies firing on his pod. Scanning the terrain he straightens up his fall into a

swandive

and then pops his first shoot and is yanked up into the air out of the sight of the enemy snipers.

 

 

He disengages the first shoot and tries to engage the second but it was damaged during the fall.

 

 

PoWER ARMOR VOICE (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Proximity alert! Brace for impact.

 

 

He falls through the roof of an alien building of some sort.

 

 

JELLY

 

 

RICO, IF YOU’RE ALIVE AND CAN HEAR THIS, SCAN MY BEACON.

 

 

Enemy soldiers surround the building.

 

 

A light inside Rico’s helmet lights up his face, blood trickling down it from a head wound.

 

 

A sudden quick shape shoots from the roof of the building and in it’s wake it leaves behind a bomb.

 

 

The bomb explodes dispatching the area.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

RICO REPORT!

 

 

RICO

 

 

My shoot malfunctioned, snoopers say I’m on the wrong side of the river.

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

I have your beacon locked.

 

 

RicO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

On my way to you.

 

 

JELLY

 

 

Shit

son, you had me worried.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Don’t lag behind.

 

 

The explosion in the warehouse he blows up goes off again igniting some ignitable substance and knocking Rico off balance.

 

 

He squares up and keeps moving.

 

 

Rico looks at device that allows him to see the formation of his squad.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

ACE REDRESS YOUR LINE

 

 

Ace

 

 

Rico, so you’re alive.

 

 

RICO

 

 

YOUR LINE.

 

 

ACE

 

 

YES SIR!

 

 

Rico hops the river in his power suit and makes his way to a sweet spot he picked out, a grouping of buildings on a hills he was planning to hit.

 

 

Rico loads and cocks a rocket launcher from his back.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

ACE STRAIGHTEN UP I SAID!

 

 

ACE

 

 

YES SIR!

 

 

JELLY

 

 

ALL HANDS!

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

PLATOON, BY LEAPFROG! FORWARD!

 

 

SERGEANT JOHNSON

 

 

BY LEAPFROG! ODD NUMBERS! ADVANCE!

 

 

Rico lines of up his rocket launcher pulling the first trigger to lock and then the second trigger decimating what could be a temple or a palace.

 

 

RICO

 

 

SECOND SECTION, EVEN NUMBERS

 

 

Rico jumps clear of the building.

 

 

RiCO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

ADVANCE!

 

 

His power suit allows him to jump the next row of buildings as he advances.

 

 

With his free hand he uses a hand flamer to burn the buildings as he passes.

 

 

He fires another set of

H.E

bombs from the Y rack on his shoulders but passes too quickly to see their effect, just bathed in the light of the explosions against the night sky.

 

 

An enemy comes out of the building Rico is approaching they see

eachother

.

 

 

JELLY

 

 

ODD NUMBERS ADVANCE!

 

 

Rico flames him and jumps over the building he’s coming out of.

 

 

But he’s distracted by having to act so fast and he poorly times his jump coming up too high and too wide leaving him exposed.

 

 

He attracts the attention of a group of enemies and comes down badly on the roof of a factory covered in pipes and wires.

 

 

He jumps again scattering a cluster bomb to keep them busy.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

SECOND SECTION! EVEN NUMBERS

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

ADVANCE!

 

 

Rico sees something in the distance and gets a high vantage point to activate his snoopers. His gear is firing their payloads automatically now as he lands after each jump. He sees some sort of large building in the distance which he thinks could be their waterworks.

 

 

JeLLY

 

 

JOHNNY! RED! START BENDING IN THE FLANKS!

 

 

RiCO

 

 

SIR!

 

 

RED

 

 

SIR!

 

 

Rico activates his beacon.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

SECOND SECTION CURVE IN!

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

SQUAD LEADER ACKNOWLEDGE!

 

 

ACE

 

 

SURE THING!

 

 

 

 

 

ACE (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Already on it, pick up your feet.

 

 

The home defences start to rally and Rico narrowly dodges a missile fired at him, rattling his teeth.

 

 

Then a beam is fired overhead and he stops frozen.

 

 

He jumps frantically trying to keep moving and get out of that spot landing in a crowd of enemies firing his flamer in a wide fast burst.

 

 

He moves on but his Y rack has run out of bombs and he stops to reload it with the last of his

H.E

bombs and check his position.

 

 

He flips his snoopers up to scan the battle field for something substantial to hit with his last two A rockets.

 

 

He fires off into the distance there are a series of unidentified explosions above so Rico decides not to risk a jump.

 

 

He takes out a beam knife and cuts through the buildings instead cutting and blasting through the buildings.

 

 

Rico unintentionally breaks into a huge room full of aliens. There’s a pause as neither knows how to react.

 

 

It seems to be full of civilians taking shelter but one scared skinny takes a shot at him, hitting his armor.

 

 

Rico is rattled and jumps for cover instinctively leaving them behind a little present.

 

 

The bomb he throws

sqwarks

in their own language.

 

 

Bomb (captions)

 

 

I am a thirty second bomb!

 

 

BOMB (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Twenty nine seconds,

 

 

BOMB (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Twenty eight!

 

 

BOMB (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Twenty seven…

 

 

Rico doesn’t stick around he jumps through the roof of the building and gets a bearing on his formation.

 

 

JELLY

 

 

CIRCLE IS CLOSED, BUT THE BEACON ISN’T DOWN YET.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

MOVE UP SLOWLY, MILL AROUND.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

CAUSE A LITTLE MORE TROUBLE!

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

GOOD JOB SO FAR.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

DON’T SPOIL IT

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

PLATOON! BY SECTIONS…

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

MUSTER!

 

 

A skinny pokes his head around a corner and Rico throws a bomb at him.

 

 

JohNSON

 

 

SECOND SECTION, CALL OFF!

 

 

MIGLIACCIO

 

 

FOUR HERE!

 

 

JACKSON

 

 

FIVE

 

 

SMITH

 

 

SIX HERE!

 

 

BRUTO

 

 

SEVEN!

 

 

RICO

 

 

ACE, WHERE’S DIZZY?

 

 

ACE

 

 

NUMBER SIX, CALL OFF!

 

 

SMITH

 

 

SIXTH SQUAD, FLORES MISSING

 

 

ACE

 

 

SQUAD LEADER OUT FOR PICK UP!

 

 

RICO

 

 

ONE MAN ABSENT.

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

FLORES SQUAD SIX.

 

 

JOHNSON

 

 

MISSING OR DEAD?

 

 

RICO

 

 

I DON’T KNOW, ME AND ACE ARE DROPPING OUT FOR PICK UP.

 

 

JOHNSON

 

 

LET ACE HANDLE IT.

 

 

The pick up beacon is sounding but he turns off his

comms

.

 

 

JohNSON (

CONT’D

)

 

 

RICO DO YOU READ? RICO!

 

 

JELLY

 

 

HEADS UP! CLOSE TO RETRIEVAL.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

ON THE BOUNCE!

 

 

RETRIEVAL BEACON’S VOICE

 

 

“- To the everlasting glory of the

infrantry

, shines the name, shines the name of the Rodger Young!”

 

 

Rico hears the sound but is heading in the opposite direction.

 

 

Rico

 

 

Ace you got her beacon?

 

 

Ace

 

 

I got her, I don’t need you, go back.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

I got you by eye now, where is she?

 

 

Ace

 

 

Right ahead of me,  maybe a quarter mile/ I said go back, she’s my man.

 

 

Rico isn’t listening he’s closing in on Ace.

 

 

He finds Ace standing over Dizzy who’s downed in her suit, a couple of dead

skinnys

near her.

 

 

Ace turns to see Rico.

 

 

AcE (

CONT’D

)

 

 

I told you I didn’t need you.

 

 

Rico

 

 

Is she hurt?

 

 

Ace

 

 

I can’t tell,

why’d

take her helmet off?

 

 

RicO

 

 

Where is it?

 

 

Rico takes his helmet off to get a better look at her.

 

 

ACE

 

 

It’s over there, don’t touch it. It’s covered in something weird.

 

 

Rico goes up to her to check if she’s

ok

.

 

 

RICO

 

 

Diz

, can you hear me?

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Help me get her out of her armor, we’ll carry her to pick up

 

 

They disconnect her from her suit but something’s wrong, she’s comatose and mumbling to herself.

 

 

DIZZY

 

 

No-can’t-leave-don’t-come

 

 

Ace

 

 

What’s she saying?

 

 

RiCO

 

 

I

dunno

let’s get her

outta

here.

 

 

 

 

 

They attempt to lift her but she start seizing and flailing like her body isn’t her own and she reaches for her side arm and shoots Rico in the eye.

Starhip troopers tv show pilot Part 9

Hey there,

I was busy yesterday so no blogging could be achieved and I probably wont have new content next week because I’m working a lot but hey gotta make that bread right.

More starship troopers stuff, I keep seeing that meme going around that they’re making a new tv show but I don’t see any development, I think it was like I thought. It’s just someone trying to meme it into reality, it’s not actually happening. I really hope it doesn’t happen because obviously I dream of making it myself, but I know no one else but me will do it justice. 
I know it’s going to be super progressive woke garbage and won’t do the original source material justice. It’ll just regurgitate the stuff from the movies to pay lip service to them and completely shit on the book.

Oh that reminds me I just got a horrible taste in my mouth because netflix just released the cast for the cowboy bebop live action tv show and it’s even worse than the witcher, oh my fucking god, how do they keep getting away with this?
Jet and Faye are ok but who cares about them? Spike is who matters and there’s no sugar coating it they literally hired Harold from Harold and Kumar to be Spike fucking Spiegel. An asian actor who has no martial arts experience as far as I know, but does Spike Spiegel sound like an asian name? 
Cowboy Bebop always played the racial card close to the chest because these are people literally being born and raised on other planets. Spike is a martian literally, and his influences are obviously western and he’s based on an asian cop character as far as I know and Bruce Lee. So I mean by all means make him asian as long as you get an asian who has martial arts experience and can do Jeet Kune do. 
Don’t hire a random asian guy from fucking stoner comedies that suck. 

The problem we have is that there aren’t really any martial arts actors anymore, outside of the guys from the raid and Keanu reeves (Who would’ve made an excellent spike when he was younger). Martial arts movies aren’t really a thing anymore in the west. Action movies aren’t even really a thing. All we have are these sterile castrated comic book movies that are just glorified kids movies that appeal to perpetually stunted adults.

Which should be right up my alley right? Wrong.

Gone are the days Arnie engages in strangely philosophical action killing sprees, now he just makes movies that mock those movies.

Big block buster movies aren’t made for adults anymore, even the deadpool movies weren’t really for adults, they were just the same childish shit dialed up to 11 with no filter. Logan was what we really wanted and what the comic book movies could have been if the people who made these movies gave a shit about anything other than making stinking piles of money.

I gotta stop because I could rant about this for days and I really need to do some proof reading since I lost yesterday.

See you…

 

EXT. Terra in a park. Day

 

 

A couple of MI troops approach a bunch of kids. One of the troops holds up his weapon.

 

 

Mi troop

 

 

A fully automatic

bareeta

, who wants to hold it?

 

 

The kids jump up and down shouting.

 

 

Kids

 

 

ME! ME! ME!

 

 

The soldiers chuckle to themselves happily as they watch the kids fight over who gets to hold the gun.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

Citizen rule, fighting together for a better tomorrow.

 

 

They show one of the kids how to aim it and hold it.

 

 

They start handing out bullets to touch.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InT. a federal missile silo.

 

 

A giant missile is moved on a rail system.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

It’s big it’s deadly and everyone has an opinion on the new Q bomb!

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Experts worry about the ethics of a bomb so powerful it can crack a planet.

 

 

We see a graphic

represention

of the bomb blowing up a whole planet.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EXT. terra outside a courthouse. Day.

 

 

A middle aged politician addresses a camera with his aides behind him as he descends the steps of a courthouse.

 

 

JACQUES LANCASTER

 

 

The creation of a planet that can destroy an entire planet is a dangerous precedent for the entire human race.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InT. interview room. Day.

 

 

We cut to an interview with Murray Rosenthal credited as an expert in a graphic.

 

 

Murray Rosenthal

 

 

What people fail to realize is how many planets there are, would any average citizen even notice if one were missing?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EXT. outside a federal building. Day.

 

 

A video of an explosion at a federal building.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

A bombing earlier today injuring many on federal service men is believed to be at the hands of the terrorist organization know as the Gonneck peace movement.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ExT. outside a courthouse. Day.

 

 

A video of a fat man in a wheelchair with meddles on his chest is holding up a peace sign board and shouting into a megaphone.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

This man Elmo Gonneck, head of this movement is wanted for questioning.

 

 

Elmo gonneck

 

 

Get that camera out of my face.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

If you see something, say something, you could be in for a big fat reward.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InT. a studio. Night.

 

 

In a studio two academics are having a disagreement about the treatment of the

skinnies

.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

Federal scientists grapple with the moral issues surrounding the pacification of the

skinnies

.

 

 

Woman

 

 

The way we’ve treated those poor creatures is barbaric, it’s inhumane.

 

 

Man

 

 

Are you listening to yourself?

 

 

MAN (

CONT’D

)

 

 

It’s right there in the middle of the word ‘inhumane’.

 

 

MAN (

CONT’D

)

 

 

The word you’re looking for is ‘human’.

 

 

MAN (

CONT’D

)

 

 

They’re not human, they’re alien and they’re a threat.

 

 

WoMAN

 

 

My research states that they’re a peaceful race of people and they deserve the respect…

 

 

MAN

 

 

They’re not

humana

and they don’t ‘deserve’ a damn thing and frankly I find it offensive you’d even suggest such a thing.

 

Starship troopers pilot scene 7

Hey there,

So I haven’t heard any updates on the starship troopers tv show in development. It could just be one of those things where it’s a rumour trying to meme into existence support for a real project. Or it’s a project that just never gets off the ground. Considering the budget constraints I imagine it’s not a risk many studios would want to burden themselves with. Like if I was going to pitch this I would want to sell it as game of thrones in space with giant alien bugs instead of ice zombies. And this is me the  person who hasn’t seen a single episode of of GOT (and never wants to) haha.

Although saying GOT might not be the best strategy considering how I heard it concluded. I haven’t seen it but apparently it’s like an eight year build for the big bad to get metooed in the back haha.

I mean I don’t give a shit, I’ve never given a shit, the show has never interested me, I honestly don’t really like fantasy or sci-fi haha. 

Well I do but only a specific type of each. I’m just really particular. I hate lord of the rings, but I love Conan and Solomon Kane. I hate the fanciful, ponsey fantasy and I love the gritty, brutal, bone crushing fantasy. So I prefered stuff like Vikings over GOT, although Vikings kinda lost me because the main character sort of got cucked or died. I watch shows mainly for characters so when the characters no longer appeal to me I just stop watching.

I’m kinda the same with sci-fi because I hate shows like star trek but I loved Lexx unironically because it was fun and funny but also felt kind of real and gritty at the same time. And I also loved Battlestar galactica because it felt real, like it was just the real world in the future, it didn’t feel silly or out of place it felt grounded and real.

I’m watching this show called the Expanse on amazon prime right now and it’s even more of that kind of feeling, like just the real world in the future. The characters are a bit eh so far but I love the feel of the show. I just wish all of them didn’t have to whisper their fucking lines with like spaceship asmr playing in the background. Although I love spaceship asmr, I just also love hearing what people are saying. I can’t always read subtitles because I’m usually lifting weights while I watch these shows. But I’m really enjoying it, not really for the story or the characters because they’re both kinda meh honestly. I just love the atmosphere of the show, I like how the world looks and how it feels. It’s one of the reasons I like battlestar because it feels like this could be happening in elite dangerous. Like it’s a micro story in elite, like I’m on the otherside of the galaxy fighting some war while this story is playing out on some space station somewhere and it makes the world feel bigger.

The story is sort of I wanna say Laura in space to sound pretentious (because I read Laura look at me). But it really only borrows the ‘guy falls in love with dead chick he’s investigating’ trope. The story is kinda bog standard but I just love the feel of the world. I could totally imagine myself living on a space station like this and being like a space trucker hauling ice to some far off colony.

I didn’t do a blog the other day because I was busy, work stuff, bit of gardening irl stuff. Work has been particularly shitty recently but I’m excited about the future, I really want that new job. But I got a phone call that didn’t pick up recently from jamaica which freaks me out. Because my phone constantly gets wrong where the call is coming from and that country is too close to be considered a coincidence to the one I actually want to work in. So I’m shitting bricks and the reason I didn’t pick up is because my phone was on silent for my shitty job. So my shitty job might have cost me the good one I actually want which blows so fucking hard. 

But it’s not the end of the world because my cv is gonna be looking a lot stronger by the end of the year.

So about this scene/scenes, err, I kinda like this one from the book because it’s actually decent satire. Which people attribute more to the movie than to the book but there is subtle satire in the book sort of making fun of the intellectual class who thinks they should be running things but don’t really have the will or the balls to really do anything or seize power and probably wouldn’t know what to do with it if they got it. Despite constantly pontificating that they do. 

It’s satire because it’s sort of the way things are run now, the intellectual class make the policy and the science we’re supposed to live our lives by but it doesn’t really work and obviously in this world it all came tumbling down which it will eventually in this world too. Because the point he’s making is that the people that make the decisions have to be the ones who face the consequences of those decisions.  You can’t give power to people who aren’t expected to go out and fight to protect it. Which is why I love the logic of this world. The power to vote or be a citizen isn’t based on your intelligence, it’s based on your commitment to the system. It based on your willingness to give your life to protect it and all it stands for because with that comes the understanding necessary to wield power. 

No longer in this world with people wield power who are so disconnected from the consequences of their choices. The people that make the decisions feel the direct consequence of their actions and they know the effect it will have on them and other servicemen and women and I love that.

The system we have now people just all vote for their own interest so all you really ever get is a tug of war with all these disparate factions arguing over a dwindling pile of resources not knowing or caring what will happen to the other groups, only caring about their own.

This philosophy entirely does away with that and only gives power to a group that has the capacity to see the big picture and sees voting not as a way to get themselves more money and benefit but as a sacred duty to protect the lives and liberties of the people they serve.

That’s what I love about this world, voting isn’t just this meaningless, selfish, pointless thing. It actually has weight and means something and isn’t just a puppet show for big business interests or a shell game to give you the illusion of freedom of choice. It’s a real functioning democracy that functions as a military dictatorship.

It’s like when people say ‘well if you don’t like the system vote to change it’ but it’s a joke because your vote doesn’t really matter. But in this world it does but to get the right to vote you have to be willing to sacrifice your life or at the very least two miserable years of it in which you will be tempered into the kind of person that deserves to vote.

I think it’s a really interesting system that could actually work. I don’t want to go too much into my politics but I’m with Churchill when he said that democracy is great until you talk to the average voter. I genuinely that the right to vote should be more sacred than it is, it shouldn’t be just given to everyone. I’m not taking an elitist position where I think the populace is too stupid like the doctor in the book. I don’t think that smart doctor should vote either. It’s not just about intelligence it’s about being able to see outside of yourself. It’s about being able to put the needs of the many of your needs. 
You don’t just give the right to vote to any average person you give to someone that’s really seen what it means, that understands the consequences of voting for a war because they or someone just like them has to fight it.

How many wars would be started if just the military and veterans were allowed to vote? Probably not very many and if they did they’d be for damn good reasons. The book and the movie hint at the idea of perpetual wars like 1984 for instance with the skinnies where you can’t be certain the aggressor. But I mean what better war to fight in than with the bugs who are this mindless killing force that just want to erase humanity. Although obviously in the later movies and the tv show it sort of builds that there’s more to it to that and they’re not mindless bugs and they still dangle that lame trope of ‘oh maybe we’re the bad guys hurr durr’.

I think that’s really overdone and just sort of solipsistic in my opinion. I think it’s been done to death and people aren’t really interested in it. It’s like a starting block question, or something a stoner would ask. The story starts and you’re ‘hmm am I the good guy or the bad guy’. No you should already know that before the story starts and if you think that’s a twist, it’s not an interesting one. Can we just have a decent story where we’re either the good guys or it doesn’t matter haha? This whole introspective, neurotic questioning of motives is just boring filler. And moreover it’s part of this anti-western attack on imperialism. It’s become sort of trendy to dump on imperialism, you know that thing that built most of the modern world.

It’s just nonsense, without imperialism, the people who complain about imperialism literally wouldn’t exist or they wouldn’t have the means to even complain about it haha. Literally everyone benefited from imperialism and anyone that criticises it is just too stupid to imagine what their lives/countries/cultures would have been like without it.

Now whether it was our place to improve these places is another matter all together. But in my opinion survival is like a shark, if it stops swimming it dies. You need to keep growing and striving and pushing forward with technology and advancement and we need to ultimately make it to the stars or we’ll die as a species. And if we hadn’t advanced, if we’d stayed hunter gatherers and lived off the land we’d have all just ended up like 99.9% of all species on this earth and died. We need to get off this rock if we’re gonna live on as a species, so anyone on the opposite side of that is basically pro-extinction and there’s nothing more nihilistic than that haha.

It’s like people want to ask ‘is it moral for us to exist?’ when I’m like ‘I can’t hear you because I’m too busy existing and propagating my existence into the starts to perpetuate my existence into the millenia’. If you ask yourself this question you will literally just die pondering something that’s ultimately not important, because nothing is more important than your continued existence.

Ok well that fucking went down a weird place into like metaphysical philosophy or some shit, I dunno.

Ok enough ranting, I have editing and cooking to do and maybe more job hunting.

Oh and I just remembered I saw the new Mary Poppins movie and it was one of the most shameless cash grabs I’ve ever seen haha. I’ll probably talk about that tomorrow, or more likely I’ll start ranting and it’ll turn into a review haha.

See you…

 

InT. Recruitment facility doctor’s office. Day

 

 

Rico is getting a physical from the doctor, who pokes and prods him in a disinterested way.

 

 

RICO

 

 

What’s the rate at which people fail these tests?

 

 

Doctor

 

 

I never fail anyone. The law doesn’t permit us to.

 

 

RicO

 

 

Then why am I being tested at all?

 

 

DOCTOR

 

 

It’s part of the selection process, finding out what duties you’re physically able to perform.

 

 

DoCTOR (

CONT’D

)

 

 

You know you can’t choose your duties right?

 

 

RiCO

 

 

But I thought we could state a preference.

 

 

DoCTOR

 

 

Sure I can say I’d prefer to be a plastic surgeon living on mars but that doesn’t mean it’s

gonna

happen.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

Is that why you’re here, is this your service?

 

 

DOCTOR

 

 

Me? No I’m a civilian employee.

 

 

DoCTOR (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Military service is for ants.

 

 

DOCTOR (

CONT’D

)

 

 

I

see’em

go and I

see’em

come back, if they come back and for what? A nominal political privilege they don’t even understand.

 

 

DoCTOR (

CONT’D

)

 

 

If I were you, I’d get out while you still can.

 

 

He hands Rico his test papers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

INT. desk Sergeants office. Day.

 

 

Karl and Rico are in front of the desk sergeant as he reads over their medical reports.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

Apparently both of you are insufferably healthy.

 

 

He looks at Karl’s papers again and gives him and odd glance. Two clerks come and look at them and there’s whispering.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

We have established you are of sound mind and body and in your right minds to take the oath.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Repeat after me –

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

I, being of legal age and of my own free will –

 

 

Karl and rico together

 

 

I, being of legal age and of my own free will –

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

– do now enroll in the federal service of the

Terran

federation for a term of not less than two years and as much longer as may be required by the needs of my service-

 

 

KARL AND RICO TOGETHER

 

 

– do now enroll in the federal service of the

Terran

federation for a term of not less than two years and as much longer as may be required by the needs of my service-

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

I swear to uphold and defend the constitution of the federation against all its enemies on or off Terra, to protect and defend the constitutional liberties and privileges of all citizens and lawful residents of the federation.

 

 

KARL AND RICO TOGETHER

 

 

I swear to uphold and defend the constitution of the federation against all its enemies on or off Terra, to protect and defend the constitutional liberties and privileges of all citizens and lawful residents of the federation.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

So help me God!

 

 

KaRL AND RICO TOGETHER

 

 

So help me God!

 

 

They finalise the paperwork and take pictures of both boys.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

All done, time to break for lunch.

 

 

RICO

 

 

Sir can I call my folks?

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

You’re on leave for the next 48 hours son, so you can do whatever you damn well please.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

But do you know what happens if you don’t come back after those 48 hours?

 

 

RICO

 

 

No sir.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT

 

 

Not a damn thing.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

This is where we

seperate

the overgrown babies from the men who are serious.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Your paperwork will just be marked ‘term not completed’ and you’ll never get another chance.

 

 

DeSK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

So I’ll see you noonday after tomorrow.

 

 

DESK SERGEANT (

CONT’D

)

 

 

If I see you.

 

Starship troopers tv show pilot scene 3

Bonjourno,

Well I made a start, on Kur 2 surprisingly enough, I just had some really good ideas for how to start it and started tossing things around in my head, ideas for scenes, the developing plot and the story, themes. I do think I need to write a self inclosed book, I mean Diana is that of course but it’s not a huge book, it’s something I planned to expand over a couple of books. So now I want to make a book that expands and finishes in one book, telling a complete and epic high concept story. But you know I can’t control where my mind goes and my mind right now wants to swing a broadsword around like Conan instead of flinging super powers haha.

I’m kinda in that weird rut again in between big projects because if I write a sequel to Kur but no one likes Kur 1 then I’m shit out of luck and I really need to go back and redo a lot of the first in my opinion. But I honestly don’t know if that would improve it or make it worse.

I really should be going into something new but I’m not sure the superhero story I want to do will really be the thing that gets the ball rolling. I always just sort of write whatever I feel like but at this point I’m going to die before I even get anything traditionally published haha. I’ve sort of accepted that I’m this spergy weirdo like Lovecraft who’ll most likely die alone and  that means all that really matters is leaving behind something worthwhile. I mean there’s one thing that I can really say that I’ll leave behind that I know is truly worthwhile but in terms of my writings I can’t really pick out one thing that’s really significant, it all kinda feels like scraps, little tit bits of ok stuff floating around in a lot of junk. And I can’t tell if there’s more good than bad honestly and that’s really the difference between being remembered and being forgotten. Living forever or… not.

So I don’t know, only time will tell and other cliches, but it’s maddening and I feel like I’m running out of time and the deck is stacked against me. It’s one of those days where I wish white male straight privilege was a real thing so I could cash some of that shit in haha. If only there was a good old boys club for publishing, sadly that is not the case.

Anyway so we’ll see how that goes, I’ll continue to follow my creative ID brain to whatever stimulates me I guess. On the subject of what does and doesn’t stimulate me (epic segue haha).

I already said I bought game pass for a month to try out their games, it was like 2 quid and I feel like I got my moneys worth. I wanted to review Homefront the revolution because it’s a game that got totally fucking flamed when it came out for being a buggy mess. And I’m playing it like ‘this is really good’, it’s basically farcry 3 but or crysis but good. I don’t know another way of describing, it’s mostly just that the world feels more real and it doesn’t have these comic book villains, its just trying to make a red dawn scenario as close to reality as it would be. And I really like how the game is structured where you have these zones that are open warfare and then you have these places where people live and it’s more built up and you have to focus on stealth or you’ll be overwhelmed. I really like that pacing and strategy and the guns look and feel great. 
I was gearing up to give it an awesome review just be a contrarian fuck but then I get to the end of the game and it just fucking breaks haha. Like its just dead, I can’t complete it.

I’m obviously not that pissed because I didn’t pay like sixty quid for it, it’s included in that two quid for gamepass. But if I had paid full price I would have been pissed because I did feel invested in the world and the story was decent, not amazing but it knew when to be involving and it knew when to stay out of your way. Which is the main problem with most far cry games, they try to give you this involved story with characters you barely get a second to care about before you’re thrust up their asses and it just feels forced. I much preferred farcry 2 because the story knew to sit on the edge and just let you enjoy the game and the world.

Still watching American horror story apocalypse and I have to say it’s probably the most boring season so far, there’s a lot of filler for a show that doesn’t have that many episodes to a season. Don’t get me wrong I like the main villain, I like most of their main villains the problem is that the heroes are fucking insufferable and every character Sarah Paulson plays has the smug turned up to eleven, it’s hard to watch.

I’m expected as a viewer to look at these irritating main heroes and like them I guess but expect them to lose to the more likeable and relateable villain but then he will ultimately lose because that’s just how these stories work. They toy with these horror elements but in the end the ‘good guy’s’ always wins and it sort of deflates the whole story. Have some fucking balls to tell an actual horror story and have your heroes lose, I mean they all come back as different people anyway.

It’s just what I hate about narratives like this, they’re so fucking predictable and worse they try to make you like characters that are shitty and only really there to push a narrative.

The reason it’s boring is because it opens up this new apocalypse world which is cool, they’re living in a bunker and there are biblical themes and mad max themes and it starts to work but now we’re stuck in this middling middle bit where it’s just flashbacks before the end where it’s sort of trying to fill plotholes from previous seasons we’d already forgotten about. Like I don’t give a shit if the ghosts from season one kiss and make up, I don’t care what happened to the witches in season three, they were barely likeable there. In fact the only likeable character in that season was Kathy Baites, admittedly she’s pretty much the most likeable character in every season. I wanted to cry when she died in season six, just a fantastic actress, I love it when she plays bad guys especially haha.

But you have this cool premise you could do pretty much anything with and it feels like it’s just jerking itself off spending whole episodes dwelling on past seasons like some cheesy clipshow from hell only to end in a way I know will be predictable as fuck. I mean yeah you need to know how the anti-christ got the ball rolling on the apocalypse but do you really need to spend like half the show on it going back to previous seasons? The show kinda feels like charmed right now or supernatural. I’m still enjoying it but I know how it’s going to end, hopefully it’ll be fun before that cringefest inevitably happens. At least I know it could never be as cringe as the end of season seven, jesus jumping fuck.

Anyhoo, can’t waste the whole fucking day on this, need to get back to planning Kur 2 electric boogaloo. This of course is the rough starship troopers pilot script, here we have some of that lovely cringe propaganda Paul Verhoeven added, this isn’t in the books but I felt like it adds a layer to the world building and it’s just fun and funny and campy and how could you not do it. Just lends a spirit of fun that I think was necessary, the book is a little overly serious, I do think it needed to make fun of itself like this.

See you…

INT. Studio

 

 

A strange looking man looks in the camera with a psychedelic backdrop.

 

 

Strange man

 

 

Do you think you’re psychic?

 

 

STRANGE MAN (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Maybe you are.

 

 

An eye opens on his forehead and a weird light comes from it.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

The federation is opening testing sites today in your area for those who believe they are gifted, sign up today!

 

 

A smiling woman is sat in a metal chair with a screen behind her with large playing cards displayed on it, she’s trying to guess the them. There’s a man in front of her operating the machine.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ExT. Planet p. Day

 

 

The mutilated bodies of a colony of people in a strange desolate planet.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

Horror on planet P.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

The mutilated bodies of members of a religious cult were discovered today.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

The religious group has been warned on several occasions against colonizing restricted zones of the planet.

 

 

VoICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Was this some sort of ritual or something worse.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Only the federation can guarantee your safety, stay only zones marked unrestricted. More at eleven.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InT. Courtroom. Day

 

 

A man in chains is brought before a council of judges.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

A pornographer is convicted today.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

The sentence for this smut

pedler

is death.

 

 

A group of military police are lined up as a firing squad.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Tune in live at six on all channels.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Would you like to know more?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

InT. Karls basement lab. Night.

 

 

Rico is hooked up to a computer and is doing the same psychic test the girl in the

infommerical

was doing. He’s trying to use psychic powers to guess the playing cards. The ace of spades is on the display behind him.

 

 

RICO

 

 

The queen of hearts.

 

 

Karl

 

 

That’s the fifth guess you’ve got wrong, statistically you should’ve at least guessed one right purely by luck.

 

 

RICO

 

 

So I’m not psychic and I’m not luck.

 

 

KARL

 

 

It’s not about luck its…

 

 

KARL (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Why the interest in all this stuff so suddenly anyway, you trying to read Carmen’s mind?

 

 

RicO

 

 

It’s nothing, I’ve just been having these weird dreams recently.

 

 

RiCO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep thinking about what I’ll do after we graduate.

 

 

KARL

 

 

You’re

gonna

go on a rich kid’s vacation to mars or the outer rings of

saturn

and then you’re

gonna

go to

harvard

just like your dad wants you to. (

he’s

tinkering with something not directly looking at Rico.)

 

 

RicO

 

 

Don’t give me that rich kid

crap

, ever since we were kids everything I had was as good as yours too.

 

 

RicO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Like that rolls copter my dad got me, that was as much yours as it was mine.

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

It’s not like I asked to be this rich and good looking.

 

 

RiCO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

So what about you, big brain Karl must be going to college too.

 

 

KARL

 

 

Actually I decided to do a term of service before I continue with school.

 

 

RICO

 

 

Seriously? Why?

 

 

KARL

 

 

I

dunno

. It just seemed like the right thing to do. It just feels… natural.

 

 

Rico takes a moment to think about it.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

You’re serious.

 

 

RICO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Then I’ll join up too.

 

 

KARL

 

 

Your dad won’t let you.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

How can he stop me?

 

 

KarL

 

 

It’s not like they’ll put us in the same squad, I’m not bucking to get shot at,

starside

R & D is more my speed. You know me, electronics are my thing.

 

 

KaRL (

CONT’D

)

 

 

What about Carmen?

 

 

RiCO

 

 

I walked her home again.

 

 

KaRL

 

 

Did you ask her?

 

 

Rico

 

 

To the dance? Sure I did and she said ‘yes’.

 

 

Karl looks a little surprised.

 

 

RiCO (

CONT’D

)

 

 

What was I not supposed to?

 

 

KARL

 

 

Well there were other options.

 

 

RICO

 

 

You mean like

Diz

Flores?

 

 

KARL

 

 

It doesn’t take a mind reader to know what she wants.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

It’s Carmen for me and that’s that.

 

 

KARL

 

 

It’s Carmen for a lot of guys.

 

 

RiCO

 

 

What’s that supposed to mean?

 

 

KARL

 

 

I mean

Diz

is a better fit. Carmen’s always been

kinda

flighty

.

 

 

RicO

 

 

Funny. She likes me.

 

 

KARL

 

 

She likes your

olympic

size swimming pool.

Starships Troopers Tv show pilot Scene 1

Ok so this is as weird for me as it is for you, forgive the formatting issues, I’m using a script program and copy and pasting from it is like the word equivalent of the fly.

So it looks like ass but it gives you the general feel for it which is all that matters. Had some problems with it as I said, I started with an idea in my head and then rereading the book I liked his opening a lot more and I thought I could a lot with that that was way more subtle and would deliver more worldbuilding in the first five minutes than what I had originally sketched out.

But then pain in the ass of asses for some reason this damn program didn’t save the last five pages despite having an auto save function. So I spent yesterday reconstructing it from notes and memory, which is so disheartening, really makes you just wanna give up.

I’m almost back to where I was and if I keep pace, I should have it done within a month, maybe two.

So far it’s going really well, I think I’m blending the movie and the book in a really organic way. I’m really enjoying, I should be doing prose but this is just a fun little experiment I wanted to try, it’s not like I have anywhere in particular to send it, I’ll probably just sit on it. I’m really just killing time until all the rejections come rolling in for Diana haha. Then I can restrategize because I know that book has what it takes to hook an agent if the chick that wrote fifty shades can get an agent, that book can get an agent.

I just need to repackage it a little.

Busy tomorrow so I might do a poem but I saw this utterly beautiful movie last night called ‘Leave no trace’ where Ben Foster plays this military vet with ptsd who is living off the grid with his daughter and it was just the most touching story ever and it really spoke to me. Beautifully shot and acted, I want to do a review but it just felt so personal, there was so much that touched me personally in that film. It left me feeling so sad. 

But then of course I put on some american horror story season 6 and did a super heavy chest day and that made me feel better but it stays with me still. It was about this broken guy who couldn’t live in society dragging his daughter to live in the woods. And she’s pulled on one side by him and the other by being a normal girl who wants friends and to be around people and the ending is just so sad. Because they want to be together so badly but they just cant. I get the feels even thinking about it.

Definitely worth a watch.

It’s a slow movie, where nothing really happens but its one of those movies that holds your attention anyway.

It was based on a book too so that’s more inspiration I guess, not that I think I’m capable of writing something so moving.

Anyway now realising I have no image for this and I have to go make a folder for one brb haha.

Ok there we go.

See you…

 

FADE IN:

 

 

 

 

 

Inter title:

 

 

“Come on, you apes! You wanna live forever?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EXT. Staging area. Day

 

 

MI troops are lined up in formation as an overlay is laid over the top as an

informerial

propaganda ad for the mobile infantry.

 

 

Soldier 1

 

 

I’m doing my part!

 

 

SolDIER 2

 

 

I’m doing my part!

 

 

A shino dog in full MI regalia barks at the screen and his barks are translated a subtitles.

 

 

MI Doge

 

 

I’m doing my part!

 

 

The MI troops all laugh jovially.

 

 

Voice over

 

 

They’re doing their part, are you doing yours? Join the mobile infantry today! Remember, service guarantees citizenship! Sign up today!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ExT. Skinny homeworld. Night

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

Skinny homeworld zeta k

 

 

VOICE OVER (CONT’D)

After years of aggression, the alien threat on zeta k has been pacified.

 

An MI troop violently herds a family of innocuous skinny aliens into an enclosure. When he notices he’s being filmed he smiles at the camera and gives a cheesy thumbs up

 

VOICE OVER (CONT’D)

 

All thanks to the guys and girls in the mobile infrantry, good work trooper!

 

VOICE OVER (CONT’D)

 

Would you like to know more?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ext. Outside the skymarshall’s office. Day

 

 

A group of protestors are picketing the skymarshall’s office with signs complaining about brutality and various causes. “Sky man bad!” Protesting the fascist nature of the government.

 

 

VOICE OVER

 

 

Protests broke out today outside the Sky Marshall’s office.

 

 

VoICE OVER (CONT’D)

 

Unhappy non-citizens whining about their sorry lot.

 

 

The military police open fire on the protestors.

 

 

VOICE OVER (CONT’D)

 

 

Nice try non-citizen!

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Democracy was last century, only citizens can vote, become a citizen today and join the mobile infantry.

 

 

VOICE OVER (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Do your part for a better tomorrow! Service guarantees citizenship!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

INT. ROGER YOUNG SPACE SHIP. Drop room

 

 

All cap troopers are strapped in ready to drop.

DIZ

and JENKINS watch RICO as he sits placidly shaking in his pod.

 

 

 

 

 

JENKINS

 

 

All the injections and hypnotic suggestion in the world and your boy is still shaking like a leaf.

 

 

DIZZY

 

 

That’s Johnny Rico you’re talking about.

 

 

JENKINS

 

 

Well Johnny Rico looks like he’s about to

shit

his pants

haha

.

 

 

DIZZY

 

 

Johnny isn’t afraid of nothing.

 

 

JENKINS

 

 

Then why’s he shaking like a virgin on prom night?

 

 

DIZZY

 

 

It’s not fear… it’s like… have you been to a race back on Terra? You get close enough you can see the trembling of a race horse about to leave the starting gate… Johnny

aint afraid of nothing.

 

 

The platoon leader JELLY walks up and down the platoon for an inspection of their gear. He stops at JENKINS and presses his vitals button on his belt.

 

 

JELLY

 

 

Fall out!

 

 

JENKINS

 

 

But

sarge

it’s just a cold! Doc said…

 

 

JELLY

 

 

Doc

aint

making your drop! Fall out!

 

 

JENKINS is forced to leave the pod bay looking saddened and angry.

 

 

JELLY looks over the remaining squad

 

 

JeLLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

What a gang of apes!

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Remember! We can spare you but not that fancy

shit

you’re carrying. No heroes in this outfit, you got a job you do it you show up for retrieval on the bounce get me?

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Your’re

 

sposed

to know the plan but some of you

aint

got minds to hypnotize. This is just a raid, not a battle, a demonstration of force, we want them to know we could destroy their whole

goddamn

planet but we didn’t.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Take no prisoners but kill only when you have to and don’t come back with any unloaded bombs. Command wants the whole are we hit flattened.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

The lieutenant told me before he bought it that he’d have his eye on you.

 

 

Rasczak’s

roughnecks have got a reputation to uphold!

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Five minutes padre.

 

 

JELLY looks over at the squad chaplain who is ready for the drop like an ordinary mi, some men fall out to kneel in front of MIGLIACCIO.

 

 

MIGLIACCIO

 

 

JOHNNY RICO!

 

 

RICO

 

 

YEAH?

 

 

MIGLIACCIO

 

 

Anything you wanna say to god in case you buy the farm?

 

 

RICO

 

 

Tell him I’ll see him out there.

 

 

JeLLY

 

 

Tenn

… Shut!

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Platoon!

 

 

MIGLIACCIO

 

 

Section!

 

 

JOHNSON

 

 

Section!

 

 

JELLY

 

 

By sections – port and starboard – prepare for drop.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Section! Man your capsules! Move!

 

 

The cap troopers are slowly enclosed in their drop capsules and now voices can be heard through the radios in their headsets as they prepare to drop.

 

 

JELLY (

CONT’D

)

 

 

Bridge!

Rasczaks

roughnecks… ready for drop!

 

 

Captain

deladrier

 

 

Seventeen seconds Lieutenant!

 

 

CAPTAIN

deladrier

(

CONT’D

)

 

 

Good luck, boys!

 

 

CAPTAIN

deladrier

(

CONT’D

)

 

 

Brace yourselves five seconds!

 

 

The capsule troops wait in silence and darkness until launch, tightly wrapped in their pods

 

 

Then suddenly they’re violently ejected into space as the corvette class warship the Roger Young fires them onto the planet they’re

orbitting

like an artillery gun.

 

 

But there’s a problem with Rico’s pod, a misfire, a decoy pod collides with his pod and he’s knocked off course.

 

 

DiZZY

 

 

RICO!

Constantine Season 1 Review

This is sort of a long time coming and probably one of a million reviews of this since it’s been out for maybe more than a year now. I don’t know, but I’m not the kind of person to see some new thing and just band wagon jump. I sort of just watch and wait and stew and then eventually when no one is looking I’ll skulk in and watch it. Surprisingly I actually overall thought this was ok, it was watchable. It wasn’t as terrible as I surmised it to be. I think it had some potential, so it’s sort of a shame it was cancelled but admittedly it deserved it.

The casting was ok for the most part, the guy they got to play Constanstine was ok, he looked the part but his accent was all over the place. I mean what the fuck was that? I think he was sort of a bad actor too, I mean it’s usually good when you can tell an actor is enjoying the role he’s playing. It usually adds something like with the awesome portrayal of Negan by Jeffrey Dean Morgan, adding another layer to an actually pretty bland character in the comic. In the comic, I actually prefer the governor, Negan is a little silly in my opinion. But here the actor playing Constantine seems to have a boner for Constantine and it just comes off as an annoying smugness, he’s enjoying this too much, he’s having more fun than the audience.

The rest of the casting is lame, making Chaz an american was lazy and as usual the female character is only really there to drive the plot for reasons and has no real personality that isn’t just super daddy issues. The guy from lost playing the angel was genric.

Richie was good but considering he’s in like one comic that’s not an amazing addition. There wasn’t much I recognised from the comics except one episode about a hunger demon which was actually ok. But the rest of the plot is just generic Supernatural rip off freak of the week bullshit. Just some intern googling ‘Supernatural shit’ and trying to spin it into an hour long episode by mashing in storyline from murder she wrote. Just lazy writing 101. Something I forgave supernatural for because I liked the characters and there was overarching plot sprinkled in which is not the case for Constantine.

I mean I love Constantine, the one from the comics, which is not this twat. Don’t get me wrong my problem was Constantine in the show is not nearly cunty enough. This Constantine actually looks for cases to solve and stuff to do and help people, the one from the comic just stumbles into shit on happenstance and solves the problems usually out of his own curiosity or to save his own ass. It just feels like they’re trying to square-peg a round hole, turning an anti-hero into a hero because of ‘plot’.

Oh and did I mention over-arching plot, quick tip to the writers of Constantine; mentioning you have an over-arching plot every episode does not mean you have an over-arching plot. In the same way pointing at yourself and screaming you’re a pelican doesn’t make it so.

To have an overarching plot you actually need to have events that link to eachother and become a story, a mystery slowly unravelling, not just a bunch of unconnected shit you artificially connect with the code phrase ‘Coming darkness’ or ‘Rising darkness’ or whatever the fuck it was. It’s lazy and just bad and you should feel bad.

Essentially the problem here might not be the acting or the writing but the structure of the story telling. They’re trying to fit this huge collection of stories into this cookie cutter format that’s been done to death and a lot better. It’s the same thing in my Lucifer review, it uses a cookie cutter ‘Oh look a random event has occured now lets use my gimmick to solve it’ like how the mentalist is a fake psychic or how Monk has asbergers or whatever, the difference is those shows have likeable characters you give a shit about and an over-arching plot that actually exists and is worth munching obvious filler bullshit to see.

So overall, it needed to be cancelled as I think most comic book tv shows do because it’s just hacky pandering crap most of the time with lashings of useless filler. But it’s sad because it wasn’t all that bad, it was watchable and didn’t butcher the source material (unlike Preacher) and maybe it could have done better given another season. But I guess the character and the comic was a bit too niche for modern audiences drunk on walking dead and super hero bullshit who were already tired of ten plus fucking seasons of supernatural to watch another one without Sam and Dean.

I think it had the spark of something but it failed to make it off the ground, stick to writing COD games Goyer.

Preacher Season 1 review

Long story short; It fucking sucked.

I’m a big fan of the comic, in fact I think it’s one of the first Garth Ennis comics I’ve ever read and it inspired me to read The Boys and his Punisher Max run as well as his Hellblazer run which was great. As well as of course influencing my own writing greatly. The man is a comic legend, he goes a little too far sometimes or not far enough and he’s copied by wankers the world over but no one can do it quite like him.

That being said Preacher is probably his magnum opus, a perfect distillation of his wit and particular brand of filth and blasphemy, creating a story that is so ridiculous but well-formed and coherent it begs belief that it isn’t being burned at this minute by some left-wing feminist with pink hair. Purely because she hasn’t read it because she can’t read anything that isn’t written in period blood or is specifically about vaginas.

Preacher is probably one of my favourite comics of all time, I won’t say it’s my favourite because it’s kind of pretentious but it’s up there. The story is great, it constantly keeps you guessing, it’s funny and action packed and the characters are fantastic each with their own well developed back stories and personalities. It’s hard to express how great this comic is, I mean some of the plotlines are fucking daffy but it feels so well put together and well told that it really felt real, the characters were silly but their struggles felt real and that’s what good story telling is supposed to do. Make you forget despite the ridiculousness of the situation that you’re in a story.

amc-preacher--182679-640x320.png.jpg

But the tv show is a fucking mess. My first gripe is with the casting, Dominic whatever his face is a pathetic baby faced Jessie Custer, I don’t buy him for a second as a badass chain smoking preacher, not for a second, his head is the size of an Oreo and is just too squishy and round looking. Tulip, who cares about Tulip, she’s got to be the most throwaway character in that comic, I don’t care that they made her black but they somehow managed to make her more annoying in the show than the comic, but needless to say she’s the worst character in the series. She just never had any depth for me other than being his girlfriend, she never really has any struggle that isn’t shared, any story or character of her own. Just a generic badass female cardboard cut-out that does nothing but whine about everything and was never believable even in the comic and is now even more cartoony in the show.

My favourite character Herr Starr, the strap-on loving bald German weirdo isn’t even in it, I guess they’re saving him for I dunno maybe season four when the actual story starts.

Ok so the Cassidy casting is ok, he’s a good actor, he’s been in some stuff before, he’s fun and funny and likeable but he shows up and what is he doing? Fuck all. The entire first season is filler, unabashed, unashamed filler. Nothing happens, nothing from the main plot of the comic happens in the first season. And yes, I’m not counting the story of the Saint of killers that they took ten episodes to tell, because that was a one shot spin off about his backstory, it wasn’t part of the whole series.

So, the only part of the first season that actually happens in the comics is from a one shot that isn’t in the actual comic.

You have this massive sixty issue comic to borrow any of the number of plotlines but decide to just finger your asshole for ten episodes while Jessie tries to save some shithole Texas town for what purpose? It’s just the plot and the rationale for each character is just so fucking thin. Why is Cassidy there? What he just shows up and they become mates instantly, boom he’s there in the church for good.

Tulip shows up because she found someone from her past that fucked them both over and wants him to come help her get him and then later decides just to go get him without him anyway so it was pointless.

The whole first season is just wasting time, like one big trailer, nothing happens, the whole first season is a bunch of idiots flailing around pretending they’re following a plot when really nothing is happening.

Did the writers even read the comics or did they make up the whole story looking at covers and reading the blurbs on the back?

“Err angels, god powers, vampires, got it.”

prea
(Just found this online, fuck he would have been perfect to play Jessie, if he wasn’t, you know, starring in a show that didn’t suck haha).

Also AMC is probably the worst network for it to be on, what you can have a vampire dismantle a person with a chainsaw but he can’t so ‘fuck’ or actually fuck anyone or see any tits… in Preacher, in a Garth Ennis comic. GARTH FUCKING EXPLODING DILDO ENNIS!
It’s a joke, this is probably the rudest and crudest comic ever created, there were actually characters called ‘sexual investigators’ who’s whole job was just buggering random people, I’m not even kidding. The main villain is obsessed with getting hookers to peg him with his head in the toilet. How can this ever work on AMC?

It’s a fucking insult to the fans in my opinion and I’m amazed this pile of mediocre shit is doing so well when shows like Constantine, which were flawed sure but still had a lot of the comics in it while creating an original plot line (Maybe it was from a plotline further on, I haven’t read the more recent Hellblazer comics) got the axe. I mean Constantine was a little cheesy but the casting was on point and I think given a second season it could have done better or bombed itself into extinction, but it deserved a second chance, this pile of shit is wagging it’s dick in your face and laughing and people who aren’t fans of the show have no idea they’re being fucked.

I really have nothing much to say about it, ten episodes and nothing really happens, nothing progresses the plot, it’s just a bunch of stuff happening with interlaced snippets of the saint of killers one shot storyline, which was the only good parts. The rest is just adlibbed nonsense non-story plucked out of some Hollywood execs ass.

I mean he must use his god powers like once an episode if that and he never really does anything cool with them like telling Arseface’s dad to go fuck himself quite literally. I mean I’m sitting here with this whole comic in my laps and this show doesn’t have the balls to even have him leave his crappy church until the end of the season. So, in the timeline of the comic the first season is basically the first issue of the comic with the saint of killers one shot stretched over ten hours. That’s what a fucking joke this show is. I mean this is worse than the walking dead making a whole season about the farm they spend like ten minutes at in the comic. I mean that was boring but it was consistent and there was some action/romance/struggle/bullshit.

Preacher as a tv show in my opinion has literally nothing going for it, it’s a lot of style over substance and compared to the comic it’s an unfunny joke.

I’m pissed, I wasted ten hours waiting for this to get good and it wasn’t even so bad it was good, it was just lame. On a brighter note, I watched Lucifer season one and I really enjoyed it so I might do a review on that. Or maybe not since I appear to prefer bitching than talking about stuff I like ha-ha.
Long story short, this isn’t Preacher, I don’t know what it is, but stop it.

pre

Well anyway, rant over.

Peace out.

Have a good Christmas!

Green Sunday Chapter 11 Eggs, hash and grits (Edited)

Yo yo yo people. Don’t know what I was going for or why the big font today but fuck it. I’m back with another edited chapter. My editor is back from vacation or wherever she went. Probably battling the forces of evil in japan, fighting godzilla or something. But she’s back and hence a wild new chapter has emerged. First thing she said was the beginning sucked but she seemed to like the rest of it, thankfully the beginning is short haha.
And here it is a voila’.

Only seven chapters left, as usual follow the link to the full chapter in a more elegant format. Hopefully I’ll be going live with it on amazon sometime next year so keep an eye out for that.

Eggs, hash and grits.

~
The smell of sweat and blood and tears, the sound bare of feet on a concrete floor. Soft flesh and bone colliding. A loud chorus of people shouting and smoking and drinking. The smell of motor oil and leather hanging in the stale air. A group of people were huddled around two half-naked men knocking the shit out of each other.

“Where the fuck is Bernie?” Mojang hissed as he reclined on a large, high-backed office chair. The wheels and stand were broken. but he sat on it as if it were a low throne. A sexy biker chick in her underwear straddled him.

She leant over him with a needle and a trail of dental floss, and delicately sewed up what was left of his eye.

“Keep still baby,” she said as she pressed her slinky tattooed flesh against his.

Mojang had set himself up in a garage on the far side of town. The smell of motor oil, and the tools and spare parts clanging, put his mind at ease.

He’d holed up in the dilapidated office and the rest of his crew were getting lit on the garage floor. They took out a couple of scrappy survivors they’d picked up on their day’s raiding and set up a little fight club.

There was a ring of drunken bikers on the concrete floor of the shop. They surrounded a skinny office clerk as he pounded the cartilage of a fat barista against the concrete floor, until a satisfying, greasy, wet, snapping sound cut a swathe through the loud, drunken crowd. The clerk pounded his sweaty mitts into the stubbly fat face of the barista against the grey concrete: hot, wet, slapping sounds of meat and bone colliding on the cold, wet floor; rivulets of muddy crimson blood that would make Jackson Pollock cry manly tears. Eventually he stopped shaking and a viscous red bile started pouring from his nose and mouth.

“We got a winner!” A hairy biker in a leather waistcoat picked up the dazed office clerk by his slick, skinny wrist, propping him up. The office clerk, almost unconscious, panted out a relieved smile as his eyes rolled back in his skull.

Bernie watched from a darkened corner as they took the ‘winner’ and threw his almost lifeless body into the net of half-dead, twitching corpses, laughing as they did it.

Bernie perched in the corner next to an old payphone bolted to the wall. He rested the receiver against his ear and spoke softly.

“I hear you…tomorrow…can’t wait.” He tried to hold a smile back, tightening his face as he looked about the dim garage, lit only by unwieldy camp fires and generator-operated standing lights. He hung up the phone with a tight, satisfying click.

As the crowd got a little quieter, coming down off their wave of excitement, Bernie could hear his name being shouted.

“Bernie! Get your fat Jew ass in here!”

Bernie unfolded his arms and sighed with icy aggression as he peeled himself off the cold, concrete wall of the garage.

He popped the door of the office open. It was one of those thin plastic doors you were afraid you might yank right off. He stuck his head around the door like a temp.

“You call me?”

“Take a seat,” Mojang said, through the girl still straddling him, sewing up his eye. He didn’t move from his seat.

“There isn’t another chair in here”

“Then stand,” Mojang said as he moved the half-naked girl off his crotch. “Two minutes.”

The girl flounced out of the small office. She dragged a feminine, two-day-old musk behind her as she shut the door with a definitive bang.

“Was there something?”  Bernie said as he turned around looking at the closed door, his eyes careless.

“How does it look?” Mojang spoke to a rear view bike mirror he held up in front of his face. He tilted it down, revealing his sewn up eye. It was swollen and bloody; it looked like there was a red baseball stuck in his skull.

“Like shit.”

“You talk to him? The man? He called you?” Mojang reclined in the seat and tilted his head to one side.

“Yeah I talked to him.”

“You didn’t call me.”

“You were busy.”

“Uh huh. Well, what does he want? Do they have the scores?” Mojang seethed, his eyes scanning every inch of Bernie.

“Err, yeah but that’s not why he called. Said there’s gonna be a drop. Not even a block away – good shit,” Bernie said, grinning and rubbing his stubbly face.

“’Good shit,’ huh? OK. We’ll take it, tomorrow. This whole town is gonna burn. That fat boy and his bitch included.”

“I heard about that. Some kid did that to your face?”

“You heard about it, huh? From who? The man?”

“Around,” Bernie snorted as he pulled out a candy bar from his pocket and began opening it noisily. “Some pudgy twelve-year-old fucks you up, people talk about it.” He smiled as he took a bite out of the candy bar. Strings of caramel and nougat dangled from his bottom lip.

“Uh huh, yeah. It’s pretty fucking funny.” Mojang hopped out of his seat. He stood a good foot taller than Bernie.

“You gotta see the funny side: you lose an eye, you still got another one. We’ll get him tomorrow; his bitch too, you’ll see. You want a bite?” Bernie snuffled with the candy bar in his mouth. He smiled, breaking off a piece and offering it to Mojang as he closed in on him.

“Yeah, we will” Mojang said. A vicious smile was stitched on his face as he clutched Bernie by his jaw, forcing him against the chip board wall of the small office with a dull thud. He snatched the candy bar out of Bernie’s hand and forced it into his gaping face, wiping it all over with a forceful hand. Bernie’s neck snapped back painfully as he spat out the wrapper and he groaned as Mojang delivered a powerful uppercut under his ribs. He slid down the wall, stunned by the sudden controlled burst of aggression. “Now get the fuck out of here,” Mojang said.

~

Eggs, hash and grits.

Ladies Close Your Eyes Chapter 5 ‘Hole in the Silk’ (Raw)

Ok this in the overall book when it’s done will be the start of part 2. This is where we get introduced to the side plot with the fbi characters I pulled out of my hairy well-toned ass. Originally this story was intended as a small comic maybe around 3/4 issues long so I didn’t feel the need to go into depth and have characters investigating the murders from the other side for context but now I have free reign to do whatever the fuck I want. And goddamit I want slightly weird fbi agents looking at dead hookers!

So here’s the start of that, my main inspiration for them comes from movies like Surveillance and again tv shows like True Detective. So I wanted introverted slightly quirky people who could do the job of a toughed fed.

Updates on general shit, my day job has gotten a little crazy right now, hence the lack of content but I’m still going strong making that paper to fritter away on editors and marketing schemes. I was thinking of just giving away free money and see how that works, bribe motherfuckers to read my shit haha.

Also been reading a fellow zombie authors book and I’m actually really genuinely enjoying it. It’s like the walking dead novels but good haha. So I plan on doing a review for that sometime in the future if all goes well.

As always you can check out this whole chapter for the exclusive price of no monies on inkitt with the link provided.

Hole in the Silk

~

A black Lincoln town car pulled up along a dirt road on Riverview drive in Jurupa valley CA.

The car parked on the sidewalk in front of two green plastic garbage bins. The sidewalk consisted of a curb bracketing a patch of dirt and grass from the road. It was way out near the train tracks close to Riverside municipal on the other side of the valley.

It was a small back road, penned in by verdant hills on one side dotted with lonely single storey houses on the right. On the left looked like some kind of little ranch with a white picket fence made of metal out front. The fence of which had a wreath on it and a broken mailbox. Large trees surrounding it on one side, a small wire fence on the other. A single horse stood with its head dipped under what looked like an overturned sandwich box. Of the kind of sandwiches you get in gas stations, chewing silently. A small single storey house shrinking into the distance. Behind the overgrown shrubbery and white picket arch ways.

A shapely black woman got out of the driver’s seat. She leaned on the car door and looked around with an air of disenfranchisement. She wore a dark blue pant-suit with a grey camisole under her buttoned jacket. Her shoes were sensible black work shoes with raised rubber heels. Her hair was straight, tied back into a loose bun. She took a deep breath of fresh air, as if against her will and turned back to the car. She leaned on the open car door and craned her neck to look at the passenger seat. She was pretty trying to look dower with a practiced set of frown lines. Around her mid to early thirties, but it was catching up with her quick. She had a wide mouth, thin drawn on eye brows above small downturned almond eyes on a round warm face. Her nose was a thin strip down her face ending in a petite rounded nose. She wore no jewellery at all.

In the passenger seat was her partner. A man in his early forties, slim but well built. His suit looked more expensive than hers, just plain black with a white shirt and black skinny tie. He sat with his legs knotted playing Sudoku on his phone.

“Bored with Pokémon go already?” She said comically exasperated.

He looked up and smiled a cheeky ten-year-old smile “Too much walking”. He was handsome. Designer stubble left a little too long turned into a small shaggy salt and pepper beard. His hair was darker, slicked back tight on his head, his hairline dipped a little at the corners but it held out. He had a strong chin which dominated most of his face. The rest of it was pure jowls which sagged just a little more each day, hence the beard. He had a slightly flushed colour on his cheeks and forehead. Thin lips and small sincere eyes above a large ruddy nose with a few chips missing out of it.

She let out a breathy laugh shook her head, looked down the road and sucked her cheek before turning back to him. “Are you coming?”

He looked up, brow furrowed sincerely. “Hnh no, I’ll sit this one out”

“You sure?”

“I’ve seen it before”

“Ok” She sucked her gums and made a playful chupse sound as he smiled and shook his head. He was still looking down at his phone as she shut the door.

She straightened up and walked to the end of the drive towards a yellow sign with an arrow pointing right. The road itself looped back around the hills to a larger residential area.

She took her time walking down river view. She stopped out front a black set of gates in a walled off area of dirt. Probably for the horse to walk around in when it wasn’t pretending to be a truck stop sandwich.

She hung her hands on her hips and cast a glance down Avenue Juan Diaz. It was a reasonably nice area, quiet but for the trains. It was out of the way, in the dark you could come and go without crawling over too much bubble wrap.

The closest house was one on the corner. A single storey with a big driveway. A white Pontiac on the sidewalk out front and little red number on the driveway. Another white car in the open garage. It has a little stone path leading up a raised embankment shaded by large shaggy trees. There were two cop cars parked ‘cop-like’ at intersecting angles across the curved curb.

On the other side of the street on top of the hill was what looked like a sprawling villa or a large sand castle with large arched windows in the front. There was a large white unmarked van parked out front.

Her head on a swivel she turned back to the dirt road with the yellow sign. She was met by a steel gate almost at right angles to the black one for the horse. The gate was open at a slap-dash angle and dug into the loose dry earth. She lifted it and eased it across, it swung loose and scrapped to a stop, lifting up a layer of clay dust.

The path was too narrow for a car, lined on one side by a drainage ditch of some kind. The path itself looked well kept.

She walked without great haste down the path about a quarter of mile in the direction of the river. It lead her down a steep embankment overlooking the viaduct. One of the largest in California she’d been told.

The viaduct was a great concrete deco construction made of several arches. A train track ran across it and little else. It was slim bridge almost like one you’d expect ending in a large fort or a castle. There was only room either side for a walkway. Probably reserved for maintenance on trains that got stuck or upkeep on the bridge itself.

The embankment was overgrown with a crude path cut out leading down towards the river. She praised her sensible shoes as she gracefully descended the haphazard path towards the edge.

As she got further down the greenery thinned out and she could see them now.

~

Hole in the Silk

 

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑